The Awesome me!
by My koala-llama
Summary: AU This wasn't love He was too awesome to love, he just wanted to know more about him. To become the guy he wanted as his prince charming... because he's awesome! This was not love… he was too awesome to love! Meanwhile in Spain... ONESHOT & human names


I have only one thing to say so far… no, two things to say.

One: this is so one-sided from Gilbert's view! *grins while trying not to laugh*

Two: I am sorry Gilbert, I couldn't reach your expectations by writing 5000 words so I could show the world your awesome 5 meters (cupcakes for anyone who can guess what those 5 meters are hurrhurr~)

**~HETALIA!~**

Coming from the country that baths in the sun, the handsomest man from Spain who's flaming passion is burning stronger than the sun itself, the man who is at the moment chasing his one true love.

…this is not about this man.

Gilbert Weillschmidt, tall, handsome, a seductive bastard of an albino and damn annoying. What could you expect of someone who was best friends with a Frenchman, and said Spaniard?

Of course, as he was all this, you would expect he already had a girlfriend, right?

No.

Never going to happen, sweetie.

Never… or that was before…

Even if he had a really hot Hungarian girl as a childhood friend, she was more of a guy friend than girlfriend material. Elizabeta Héderváry was her name, beautiful, tomboyish, and also known as the frying-pan-wielding-devil-woman.

Of course, we are not going to hate her. She is the reason Gilbert's pathetic almost one-sided love began, his first love.

_**HETALIA!**_

"Seriously, woman! Why are you making the awesome me do such an un-awesome job as to keep your company while you're studying in the library for your exam. Don't you have that sissy boyfriend of yours for that?" Gilbert complained, sloppily following his childhood friend to the town's smallest library.

"You continue to complain and I will make sure you never wake up to see tomorrow's daylight, and stop taking Roderich into this!" Elizabeta replied, holding up her books as a warning. Making Gilbert effectively make more distance between them than there was from before off.

Reaching the library, Elizabeta took hold of the door handle, gripping it tightly as she quietly sighted and looked up at Gilbert with warning green eyes.

"The only reason you are with me today, is one: you're best buddies both have a date today. And two: as the kind childhood friend I am, I am keeping your company, not the other way around." She explained, pressing on the word 'your' as if explaining it to a child; making Gilbert pout in a childish fashion and about to protest, only having Elizabeta stop him.

"Look, I am not your mother – which we both know would've been really disturbing – so all I'm asking out of you is to zip your big annoying mouth and you are free to walk freely around the library" She finished, staring suspiciously at him, knowing he would try something bad she gave him a final warning before entering the library. "And if you try blowing up something – like the public toilets – again, I will personally make sure you die under my frying pan"

Swallowing hard, and with fear going down his spine, Gilbert entered the library, re-named the gateway to utter boredom.

_**HETALIA!**_

It was silent, too silent. He couldn't take it, it was too silent. Feeling restless after only 15 minutes beside Elizabeta he rose up from his chair and began to wander around the bookshelves, trying – but failing – to find something that would catch his interest.

Rounding a corner filled with Italian history, Gilbert found himself in a small closed up corner of the library.

Oh no, now you're drawing conclusions too fast, dear. He didn't find the corner interesting, not at all, really. It was simple, yet cozy; not too bright, not too dim lightning, an old, rococo-styled couch. But this was not what caught Gilbert's attention, even thought that couch looked really soft.

What caught Gilbert's attention was what sat on the couch - and I don't mean the polar bear – it was golden fluffy soft hair, a pair of calm soft gray eyes hidden behind slim glasses, and a delicate body hidden under a big sweater.

The person Gilbert saw had h** legs tucked under h** chin, reading calmly, not moving an inch. Gilbert couldn't help, but stare at the simple sweetness from the person on the couch. (AN: we are keeping the person's gender a secret for now, okay~?)

It was somehow breathtaking, taking Gilbert's awesome breath. Making him unable to move, all he could do was stare, follow the gentle bending back to the slender arms with his eyes. Feeling his heart race, throat dry up and a little dizzy, he swallowed hard, trying to wet his throat; while feeling his heart speed up with every second passing by.

It almost began to become painful as he clutched his shirt, right were his heart was beating painfully under his ribcage.

And those eyes, those beautiful clear eyes; If only he could walk over and take those damned glasses off; he could blissfully drown in them if he had the chance to. But what Gilbert really found attractive was those soft looking lips, he had such an urge to just cup that beautiful face and -

_Ha… what the heck are you thinking Gilbert? _He stopped himself from thinking any further about his big urge, mentally slapping himself in the progress.

_You are not ogling some geek; you are way too awesome for someone like this… _He thought, unconsciously moving behind a bookshelf, spying at the person from there.

He came to the conclusion he was ill, as he was being silly and out of character. Hiding away like some creepy stalker, staring at a person he didn't even know. If Gilbert was himself he would have thrown himself on the couch, circled a strong arm around the waist of that person and leaned down to give that Blondie a full on French kiss.

Only the thought of it made Gilbert's heart burst, imagining the feeling of those soft lips making him blush immensely while grinning in a foolish way.

Again catching himself in thinking thoughts not meant to be thought be someone as awesome as him, he slapped himself. This time physically not mentally, his cheeks stung from the slap, but it wasn't enough to wake him up from his – he's denying it – love struck moment.

His heart wouldn't settle down and his breath was still sharp and uneven. He had to get himself together, he was Gilbert! The most awesome person in this world, he couldn't fall in love, he was way too awesome for lame feelings like 'love'.

Casting one last look at the Blondie, Gilbert dragged himself back to where Elizabeta was sitting against his inner will.

.

_**HETALIA!**_

.

"What's wrong, mon cheri? You are sighting like a school girl in love." Francis remarked, casually waving his hand in front of Gilbert's face, brows knitting as the albino hadn't even touched his beer yet.

"What are you talking about? No way is the awesome me sighting over something as pitiful as love, I'm too awesome to love!" Gilbert shouted out, with his face flushed, not from drinking.

Francis covered his ears from the shouting, having a 'stop lying, mon amor' look on his face as Gilbert huffed and puffed, not wanting to admit he was in love, and not liking the look on his French friends face.

"That's nice and all, dear. So?" Francis asked, as if Gilbert knew what he was asking about, something he clearly didn't; which only made the French man roll his eyes at him.

"So who is it? Your chosen one, your goddess of love, your soul mate bound to you by fate?" Francis asked again, overdramatizing, satisfied with the red color spreading over the albino's face, same red shade as his eyes.

Silence filled in between the young men as Gilbert's pride stopped him from answering. As the silence dragged on between them, Gilbert couldn't take it as he brutally rose up from his seat and stomped out of the bar, mumbling something between 'un-awesome feelings' and 'French crap'.

Only making Francis sight and roll his eyes at the albino, while smiling knowingly. Love sure is difficult if pride gets in the way, eh?

.

_**HETALIA!**_

.

No, Gilbert's not doing what you think he's doing… and I'm not talking about masturbating now you perverts (including me). And he was especially not following the blond geek around town… just because he spotted the Blondie when he was wandering aimlessly around.

And he wasn't standing behind a brick wall now, watching the Blondie enter a kindergarten.

Pffft, of course not!

… Okay so maybe he was, but it didn't mean any un-awesome feelings were involved!

He was way too awesome for feelings like love! And to some geek like… like… it was first then the thought hit Gilbert like Elizabeta's frying pan.

What gender was the geek?

Well, the geek looked fairly slender to be a guy and the soft blond hair was all fluffy and soft looking and un-manly, and the Blondie had long eyelashes as well as beautiful eyes.

The blond kid was a girl, was Gilbert's conclusion, yet something about it seemed more like wish thinking than a conclusion.

It wasn't that Gilbert was homophobic, oh please no, he was way too awesome for something like that. He simply found it easier with girls, and he hadn't really done it with a guy before… but he was awesome, so he would rock their world, even what gender they were!

Determined to find out what gender the blond kid was Gilbert started to walk toward the kindergarten, only to turn around and speed back to the safety of the brick wall.

It didn't go as planned, slumping down with his back pressed to the brick wall he squeezed the place his heart was beating frantically under his shirt and ribcage. His body went numb and a blush spread all the way to his neck and ears, it was uncontrollable. How his heart started to beat, his breath start to hitch up, his mind go blank, and only by the thought of talking to the blond kid!

It was unbelievable, an insane mix of delight and pain. Snapping out of it, Gilbert slapped his cheeks before he stood up, brushing off his pants. Gazing longingly one last time at the kindergarten, he walked off – denying such feelings and the fact his gaze was 'longing'.

.

_**HETALIA!**_

.

"Blond with glasses and works in a kindergarten… oui, I know someone like that" Francis answered bluntly, taking another bite of his blueberry tart while letting Gilbert worry crazy whatever or not his French friend had taken his one true love – which he denies – to bed or not.

Noticing Gilbert's murderous look, Francis rolled his eyes as he slipped his arm casually around the albino's shoulder, leaning in as he got ready to do his thing… no, not sexual harassment.

"Mon amore, you have nothing to worry about as I see your love as a cousin" Francis began; only making Gilbert more suspicious about him. Francis doing incest, it was only a question of time… if he hadn't already done it.

"Stop looking at me in that way, I was babysitting cute little Matthew when we were younger." Francis explained, sipping maturely from his wine, smiling knowingly at Gilbert.

"…Younger? That's a crime…" Was all Gilbert answered, giving Francis a mixed look of jealousy and disgust as he swatted away Francis' arm.

"I'm telling you I didn't do anything!" Francis defended himself, starting to feel annoyed he waved his hand as if making the subject vanish he asked. "Anyway, you're head over heels for Matthew right?"

The answer Francis got was a stuttering crimson blushing Gilbert which he took as a 'yes' even how much his albino friend denied it.

"As your generous and fabulous friend, I'll tell you all I know about him." Francis offered only to be brutally interrupted by Gilbert himself.

He stood up, red faced and everything, and marched away shouting out over his shoulder how useless Francis was and that he could do everything by himself because he was just that awesome. Leaving Francis by himself, sighting he finished the pastry and continued to drink his wine, wondering if he was ever going to find love like them… first Antonio, now Gilbert…

Meanwhile in Spain… or at least with Spain's handsomest man alive:

"Lovina Vargas… will you marry me?"

"…three free meals and a nap with pasta" was the answer he got.

…but this is another story…

.

_**HETALIA!**_

.

"…um… are you feeling alright?" came a gentle, almost whisper, surprising Gilbert as he furiously turned his face toward the direction the voice came from, only to have his heart almost beat through his ribcage, up his throat and out of his mouth.

This was planned; it was a part of Gilbert's awesome stalker plan.

…Okay, it wasn't and it wasn't anything good either. Not that being near the one he loved was a bad thing, but he was simply not mentally prepared for it yet.

…not that being mentally prepared was necessarily, Gilbert was too awesome for such.

…okay, maybe not, but this was one day going to happen – Gilbert had simply not thought that far ahead.

It had been a week and Gilbert had still not manned himself up to go and talk to Matthew, so instead he had stood near the kindergarten and stalked the poor blonde guy.

Yet even after Francis had reviled both Matthew's name and gender, all it did was make Gilbert more curious about the blond kid.

And at last, after who knew how long, while taking the trash out Matthew had spotted Gilbert's white head and had walked over to see who it was.

Gilbert himself was sitting down, face slightly flushed and eyes glassy. Not from feeling ill, but from hard thinking and the bubbling insane sensation he was feeling building up from the pit of his gut.

Once he heard Matthew's voice, he hurriedly got up from his sitting position, stuttering out meaningless gibberish as an answer.

"Please calm down" Matthew said, as Gilbert's face heated up and he clamped his mouth shut after the frantic meaningless rant involving lots of "I didn't stalk you" and "Why are you so cute?"

"My name is Matthew Williams" Matthew presented himself as he smiled sweetly and reached out a hand to Gilbert, which Gilbert took in his much bigger hand.

"Gi-Gilbert Weillschmidt" He answered, kicking his mental ass for being so un-awesome as to stutter.

"So Gilbert…" Matthew began, only to be disturbed by Gilbert who unconsciously reached out a hand and stroke his cheek.

God, having Matthew say his name from those cute slim lips was enough to send Gilbert to high heaven! Brushing Matthew's cheek was even better, the soft skin under his hand and playing with the soft hair, not to mention Matthew whimper under his breath and slightly lean into the touch.

Oh how he would love to be doing this all day.

Snapping out of his daze, Gilbert took back his hand as he blushed furiously. "No… um, you had something on your face…" Gilbert stuttered out, cursing himself for the weak and pathetic excuse.

Where did the self-confident go? He was Gilbert Weillschmidt for Christ's sake! The overly annoying and confident guy who could get anyone, anytime into bed with him!

"Oh, it must have been from playing with the kids!" Matthew innocently explained as he stroke his own cheek, checking if there was more on his face.

Swallowing hard, Gilbert took Matthew's hand in his own and cupped the younger boy's cheek in his hand and started to lean forward. It would only be a kiss; it was Matthew's fault for being so defenseless, and with those thoughts Gilbert continued to lean forward.

Only a few centimeters left.

Only a few moments left until he could taste those sweet lips.

Shifting his crimson eyes from Matthew's lips to his eyes, Gilbert's resolve shattered.

Literally.

Those big innocent gray eyes, looking at him with confusion and a hint of fear was enough for Gilbert to want to kill himself. It was not meant to be like that, Gilbert didn't want it to be like that.

He couldn't kiss him, Gilbert wanted to laugh at his own pathetic-ness, but he simply couldn't kiss him. It wasn't right like that.

Quickly shifting himself a little away from Matthew he laughed in an awkward manner.

"Sorry, um… Mattie was it?" He quickly began while scratching the back of his head and going through whatever question he could come up with "I was just wondering, what would you consider the ideal… prince charming…?" He asked in an awkward voice, smiling unsurely of himself.

Matthew stared at the other, taller man for a minute before bursting into a quiet giggle, which only added to Gilbert's blush.

"I'm sorry" Matthew quickly apologized, as he tried to calm himself down and unconsciously enchanted Gilbert with his sweet smile.

"Let see…" Matthew began, tapping his chin in thought "The ideal prince Charming should be charming – naturally – and…" Matthew was about to continue until Gilbert interrupted by placing his hands over Matthew's mouth.

"No, um, that's… enough… I got to go…" Gilbert stuttered and before Matthew could stop him, he was gone. Only a running form in the distance was seen, and a confused Matthew was left.

_What am I thinking? _Gilbert shouted in his mind _Prince Charming? Where the heck did that un-awesome thing come from? Why did I, the most awesome man alive, ask such an un-awesome thing? It was like I asked after his type… which I do not care about! I'm WAY to awesome for prissy stuff like love! _He ensured himself as he came to a halt, breathing hard from the running and now surprisingly enough outside of the small library he had first seen Matthew.

"Charming…?" Gilbert asked himself as he remembered Matthew's words.

"Who needs charm? I'm awesome!" Gilbert shouted out, followed by a crackling laugh and bystanders giving him suspicious looks.

Huffing out in satisfaction he let his feet lead him into the library.

.

_**HETALIA!**_

.

"…are you about to die?" Elizabeta asked, looking Gilbert up and down as she checked his temperature while fishing up her cellphone to call the closest hospital.

"What makes you think that?" Gilbert shoots back as he stopped Elizabeta from calling, giving her a dirty look.

"You're in a library… reading" Elizabeta answered, as if that explained everything, which Gilbert only answered with rolling eyes.

"Then again it's not that impressive when you are reading Disney's Cinderella picture book" Elizabetha commented as she looked over Gilbert's shoulder to see what he was reading.

"Be thankful you are watching the awesome Gilbert doing research!" Gilbert sputtered out, pouting manly in the progress, and this time Elizabeta rolled her eyes.

"Yeah, yeah so what are you researching?" Elizabeta asked, as she looked through the several other children's books Gilbert had next to him. "Wait a minute…" She stopped in her tracks and gave Gilbert a horrified look. "Don't tell me you have sunk low enough to go into an alliance with Pedobear?" She asked shocked, with a hand raised in front of her mouth and fry pan in the other.

"No, I've not!" Gilbert shouted out in protest with hands raised as the red alarm went off once he saw the frying pan. Only to be hushed on by people beside him.

"I have not" he repeated himself, now in a lower tone.

"Then what?" Elizabeta asked with a smug grin in place and a raised brow "Are you looking for the perfect ball gown or something?"

"No…" Gilbert answered in a hesitated tone, knowing fully how miserable his childhood friend would make him feel once she heard the reason. "It's something only the awesome me could fully understand just how awesome it is!" He claimed.

"Oh, then let me hear it, just what awesome research is Lil' Gilbo doing?" She teased as she leant over him and poked his cheek with a slim finger.

"Just what makes a prince Charming… charming?" he asked with a light blush in place and closed eyes, ready to get laughed at, but what met him was only silence.

He cracked an eye open and looked up at Elizabeta's disturbed expression. Silence stretched between them until Elizabeta checked his temperature again while quickly calling the closest hospital, describing this as an emergency situation.

Meanwhile in Spain~ …or at least with Spain's handsomest man alive~

"I already told you; the best way to woo that stubborn old goat is to shower her with love until she gives in!" Bella explained for what felt like the millionth time for her.

"But I have Bella! I have!" Antonio whined in a voice which said he was about to cry any minute.

"Then continue to do it, idiot!" She scolded.

…this is another story… (Which I might post out, depending on my mood)

_**HETALIA!**_

Oh old man Fritz, please tell him he wasn't seeing what he was seeing.

Unfortunately enough Gilbert was; His old boss… Ivan!

And if that wasn't bad enough he was seeing his old boss, Ivan stalk no other than his - When did he become his? – Matthew!

This was the worst, the worst… to have competition… stopping himself Gilbert slapped himself, hard. No, no he was not just thinking about Matthew as his, he was all too awesome for such…

So it didn't mean anything if Matthew were to be taken by anyone other than him. When he thought that Gilbert felt a pang in his heart and he couldn't help, but feel angry. Really, really angry; the type of angry Antonio got whenever someone stole his sneak shot of that grumpy Italian girl sleeping.

Why… when he was too awesome for love, so why did he feel angry at the thought of having Matthew taken?

Not managing to understand his own thoughts, Gilbert ran off… not noticing how Ivan was staring at the man beside Matthew, not Matthew himself.

Nor noticing how Ivan had seen him and thought the same as him…

.

_**HETALIA!**_

.

"Ohohoho~" Francis laughed, looking more smug than before "Look who came for my help in the end~" He snickered as he looked down on Gilbert's pissed off form.

"It's okay mon cheri, everyone wants a piece of the fabulous moi's advice~" Francis continued, snickering.

Grumbling under his breath, Gilbert took a seat across the French man, expecting the worst – most likely something that would hurt his pride.

"I can already guess your situation from the look on your face" Francis began as he ordered white wine from the cute waitress "and I have only one thing to tell you" He said as his whole composure became serious and his eyes darkened a tad bit.

Swallowing hard Gilbert unconsciously leaned forward, ready to hear that his awesomeness wasn't awesome enough, or worse… he wasn't awesome enough to bed Matthew!

The minutes ticked past them and so did the silence, feeling the thence atmosphere between them the waitress hurried filled Francis' crystal clear wine glass, left the bottle there and escaped before she could interrupt, only to have one of her pig tails tugged at. Turning around she caught Francis kiss the hair and wink at her before he let it go and she escaped, now with a crimson blush in place.

And no, unfortunately enough, the waitress couldn't sue Francis for the sexual harassment as he was the owner of the café and they already agreed to the groping since the pay was laughably good.

Turning his attention back to Gilbert, Francis took a sip of his wine before he gave his advice "Just ask yourself, what do you want to do to him? Is it okay to see him in someone else's arms?" Francis asked with a brow arching upward and wineglass leaning elegantly under neat his bottom lip, smirking like a fox in the progress.

Gilbert's eyes widened – because he was just that awesome – as realization hit him yet again like a frying pan. A bright – and awesome – smile stretched over his face as he finally understood; he had right! It wasn't love, it was just a really, really possessive and kind of obsessive lust!

It all made sense why he wanted to cup that cute face and touch those pink lips with his own and why he had felt nervous and anxious at times.

He brutally stood up with a new found hope and enthusiasm shining in his eyes "That's it! It all makes sense now, thanks Francis!" He shouted out in joy as he began to walk away from the table and the café. Ready to rock Matthew's world (and his bed), leaving a slightly dazed Francis who had to ask himself is he should call the hospital now or after the albino had done whatever he had thought up.

.

_**HETALIA!**_

.

Stepping up toward the big Russian man, Gilbert brazed himself for the awesomeness he was about to do.

About to open his mouth and shout out, Matthew and a Chinese man – or was it woman? – came out of the kindergarten, finished working for the day.

Ignoring them for a moment Gilbert called out to the Russian man, "Hey! Ivan!" he shouted out, slightly trembling when he saw those cold, cold violet eyes settle on him.

"Ah, Gilbert. Long time no see, yes da?" he asked in his childish, innocent voice; which hid the danger under it.

"I challenge you!" Gilbert shouted out as he pointed his awesome index finger at him "The prize is of course, him!" he declared as he moved his finger from Ivan to the direction Matthew and the Chinese man stood.

Them both looking slightly confused.

_**HETALIA!**_

Here let me show you a picture of a panda since these scenes are the type I don't really like to write. Oh what? You don't want the panda? Well, what if I tell you it's not a panda, but Ivan in a costume? Do you want it then? No? Awww, too bad.

This guy was though, but no way was Gilbert going down. Not when the prize was Matthew.

"Hands of…" Ivan began as his dark aura grew tenfold, making Gilbert swallow hard and take a small step back. "My Yao!" Ivan shouted out, effectively embarrassing the Chinese man and surprising Gilbert.

_Wait, wasn't this fight over Matthew?_ Was the last thing Gilbert managed to think before Ivan punched him hard in the face, an ultimate KO.

Stepping on Gilbert, Ivan made his way to his prize; Yao.

"Wa-wait a minute, aru!" Yao shouted embarrassed out as Ivan easily picked him up bridal style and walked off, again stepping on Gilbert.

Matthew left alone with Gilbert he hesitantly stepped forward "Gilbert?" He asked out in an unsure soft almost whisper.

Once he heard his named called, Gilbert got up with a lot of curses under his breath and hissing. Having his back toward Matthew he turned towards him.

His face was badly beaten, there was blood on his cheek and one eye was firmly shut by a yellow and purple swelling. He tried to speak but there was no sound.

He couldn't, it would just come out as gurgle sounding noises. So instead he did what he had wanted to do for a while. He stepped up and took hold of Matthew's wrist, pulling the poor boy toward him and smashing their lips together in a firm kiss. It hurt but it was worth it, especially when he saw Matthew shut his eyes and lean shyly into the kiss. His lips were soft compared to Gilbert's, it tasted blood but it was so damn worth it.

Gilbert nibbled carefully on his bottom lip, making him gasp in surprise. Taking the opportunity he pushed his tongue into the blonde's mouth, discovering everything there was about it, and as he found Matthew's tongue which tried to push him back, he found himself lusting for more. Gilbert's arm circled the blonde's waist and tugged him closer, as close as possible while his other hand cupped Matthew's cheek with his fingers tangled in his hair; Matthew squeaked in surprise but didn't push away.

So comes the big bad question; what the heck am I writing?

Oh yes, it's a kissing scene… sorry, I kind of went blind there for a second. So who wants that picture of Ivan?

…

Meanwhile in Spain! …or at least with Spain's handsomest man alive!

"What does red carnations means to begin with, bastard?"

"Oh? It means 'My heart arches for you'"

"Chi-chigi! Do-don't say that in public… bastard"

… I am so going to write this story~

**~HETALIA!~**

What can I say?

He's just that awesome!

Ps: yes, it's fem!Lovi if none of you got it? It's kinda a hinting to my story 'In your dreams' and other stories I'm writing at the moment.

Pss: I need your help, solider! Would any of you crazy fans out there be interested in becoming my beta-reader? Not just one person, I'm talking about all of you girls~! (and guys)

The pairings and what I'm writing about is written on my profile, just PM me if you're interested okay~?

And reviews are always nice~


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